Talk:Simone Murphy/GA1

GA Review

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Nominator: Launchballer (talk · contribs) 15:09, 16 April 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: Kimikel (talk · contribs) 02:51, 11 October 2024 (UTC)

Hello, I am going to review this article as part of the October GA backlog drive. I should be done within a week. Kimikel (talk) 02:51, 11 October 2024 (UTC)

@Launchballer: Please see my review below. Let me know if there are any questions or concerns with my suggestions, or if you will not be able to complete the review in a timely manner. Thank you. Kimikel (talk) 03:43, 13 October 2024 (UTC)

Well-written

Early life and Britain's Next Top Model

• "she walked out of" > quit
• "on the grounds that Manchester" > because it
• "work available down there" > work available
• "from her agency" > from Murphy's agency
• "lots of jobs" > many jobs
• "before deciding she could not be bothered" > but did not want
• "only for the producers to email her back" > only doing so after the show's producers emailed her
• "after which she found it easier to obtain work." > remove

Music and presenting

• "the pandemic" > the COVID-19 pandemic
• "After returning to Scotland" > the second half of this sentence has nothing to do with the first, break them up
• "During the pandemic, modelling work dried up, and Murphy realised that she wanted to make music, so spent lockdown teaching herself." > After modelling work became harder to find during the pandemic, Murphy spent the lockdown teaching herself to make music.
• "In 2023, she released" > In 2023, Murphy released
• "a further track" > another track
• "preferring to take punters" > I can't find a definition for "punters" anywhere that fits this context, perhaps a different word would be better
• "nail pop up" > perhaps explain what this is
• "annotated with artwork" > decorated with artwork

Personal life and artistry

• "after a long dating pause after dating people in the modelling industry" find a way to get rid of this double "after"
• "[sic]." > which part needs a sic?

Verifiable

• A ton of sources are missing authors and dates. Go through all of them and see which ones can be input.

Spot check

1. 1: Maybe I'm missing it but I don't see where states her birthday is 29 July
2. 4: Missing author and date
3. 3: Missing date
4. 29: missing date
5. 27: missing author

Broad

• Broad in its coverage

Neutral

• Neutral

Images

• No images, but not a detriment to the article

Stable

• Stable